Showing posts with label Massengills. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Massengills. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

9-14 July: Thailand 2, Pt II- North

10-14 July: Massengills up north

Chiang Mai is one of KK’s favorite Thai cities. Not as insane as Bangkok, Chiang Mai is still the second largest city in Thailand. 1.5 million people call the region home (vs 16 million in Bangkok). It is over 700 years old. Originally the capital of the Lanna Kingdom, it was ruled by the Burmese for a bit (1500-1650ish) before being re-taken by the Thai. Today the original moat still surrounds the Old City, as well as portions of the original defensive walls. The northern Thai are more laid back than their southern cousins. They speak a bit slower, and the dialect does have a few different words compared to the central (Bangkok) dialect. It is easy to adapt, and the locals are even more excited when you use the “northern” thai words in the right places

The originally planned hotel is full. Who knew? We let the driver recommend a second place. Allegedly remodeled recently… Hopefully they did not pay too much. We suck it up for a night then move on to the Royal Lanna. It is a nicer place with a pool, right next to the main strip of the Night Bazaar. The Night Bazaar area is very tourist oriented. “Hill Tribe” ladies walk about with chirpy wooden frogs and rough silver jewelry, and pseudo-permanent sidewalk booths take up most of the walking space. In the way of Thailand, many booths sell the exact same stuff. This makes bargain hunting practical when you have the patience to wade through the hordes of tourists and hawkers.

Wat Chedi Luang, one of over 1,700 temples in the area, has a 700+-year-old brick pagoda as its centerpiece in the heart of the Old City. It also offers a daily Monk Chat. Monks are available to answer questions about Buddhism, Thailand, and anything else you would like to hear about. It is an excellent opportunity for the monks to practice their foreign language skills and interact with farangs. There are rules, and the most important is DO NOT TOUCH MONK. If a woman touches a monk there is an elaborate and time consuming cleaning ritual he must go through. In Thailand there are no female monks, and a very small contingent of Buddhist nuns.

We had a big group sit down and learned a few tidbits: The color yellow is worn by many many Thais. Yellow is the color of Monday, the day of the week the HRM The King was born. Monks have two robes, so there is one to wear while the other is being cleaned. You must be 18 to become a monk. Younger people can be novices. Virtually all males in the kingdom spend at least a few weeks, usually three months, as a monk. Typically right after high school, and/or college. Men will also take breaks during their lives to spend a few weeks or even months doing it again. This is a form a merit-making, as well as a way to maintain perspective and focus on what is important. Monks do not eat after 12 noon. The food they eat is donated each morning. They are vegetarian. Monks are not allowed to exert themselves: no running, sports or other types of athletic activity. Monks do not consider Buddhism a religion. Buddha was a philosopher. The Lord in Lord Buddha refers to his position, before attaining enlightenment, in the higher caste of Hindu society. He was a prince, and entitled to the title.

The immense brick pagoda (Chedi in Thai, sounds like “JD”…) was damaged in an earthquake a few hundred years ago. It is still standing. It has not been repaired so it can be a demonstrative model of the finite nature of all things, living and not. Nothing can last forever. Death and decay are a part of the natural cycle. Etc.

A few blocks south of Chediluang is the Madrock climbing shop. It will be nice to get a few dry climbs in so we go to check it out. This rock shop knows its clientele. In addition to full-guided climbs, you can just rent the local climbing guidebook for the day and hire a driver. We choose that option. We figured we would hire Mr. Mung, a driver who was working the corner by the Royal Lanna. He seemed like a nice guy, asked a reasonable fee, and had a van.


It was time for happy hour and a dip in the pool- we hop a red truck and head back to the hotel.

There are almost no metered taxis in Chiang Mai. No city buses either. If you need a ride there are Red Trucks (sawngthaews) and tuk-tuks. As you may recall sawngthaews are the converted pick-up trucks. Flag one down, tell (or show) the driver your destination. If he feels like going that way he will grunt in the affirmative and you hop in the back. Lonely Planet had directed us always “confirm” the fare before climbing aboard. As it turns out, this is not the best way. Most drivers will automatically double, triple or even quadruple the normal farang rate, correctly assuming you don’t know any better. Of course you negotiate down, but rarely to the base rate. We discovered after a few weeks here the procedure is to just pay the driver a reasonable fee when you jump off. Farangs should be paying about 20 Baht for all but the longest trips. Thais will pay between 5 and 15 Baht. Having the front desk of your lodging write the name and address of your destination in Thai script is quite helpful in making sure you end up in the right place.

There is a Muay Thai boxing match going on just up from the hotel. Like on Samui it is an amateur ring in the center of a girly-bar court. We pack up as a big family unit and head off to the fights. We miss the bantam weights: less than 100 pounds, but catch the middle and heavy weights: 100-140 pounds. It was educational for the girls in many ways. The boxers all are highly respectful of each other and their skills. True sportsmanship, you take a guy out, then help him to his feet and give him a hug. We were also right next to a lady-boy bar. Many lady-boys opt to surgically modify what nature has not… and Thailand has some of the best cosmetic surgeons in the world. Probably the best at trans-gender surgery. Between bouts they had a chorus line and cabaret show in the ring and in the bar itself. As I said- educational.

JD, KK, Jill and Danielle take a day-long cooking class. Yes, you are reading correctly. KK has taken a second cooking class in less than a year. I know… take a moment. Breath. Do not panic. Rest assured that Hell is not starting a hockey league, livestock is not suddenly avian, and I am mostly certain this Pope is not a woman. KK is quite clear that there are no plans to expand her kitchen time. (For any who might not know: JD is the cook. He likes it, he is good at it- some say really good at it, and is highly territorial when it comes to “his” kitchen…) She is, however, interested in how she can be more helpful in the preparation stages without pissing JD off.

JD is an alumni of Baan Thai , class of Tues & Wed 11/23 & 11/24, 2004. He brings the ladies to his alma mater for their training. The menu for this class day is Spring rolls, Som-Tam (papaya salad), Kao Soi (Chiang Mai Noodle), chicken fried rice, fried banana and yellow curry paste. Our classmates included a couple from Calgary and two sisters form Holland. Baan Thai is kind enough to take and post photos of your experience.
It was a good day, we ate too much and learned a lot. (OK- the secret to Thai cooking is the main ingredient: The Smile! Cheezy, yes. Also the order you add things is pretty critical as well... And it needs to be as fresh as possible... And the wok has to be the right temp...and.and.and....)

Thursday was climbing day. Mr. Mung picked us up bright and early. He was happy to have the work, however he was bummed about missing the football. Apparently today was the first day of the Asia Cup championships and Thailand was playing Oman. He had purchased a new TV just for this event. None-the-less he takes us to Crazy Horse Buttress which is the climbing area east of the city. The rock was grippy and the weather perfect. We climbed ourselves silly and headed home. The people who first bolted these climbs were not afraid to drill; 20 meter climbs with 12+ bolts. While the rock had sharp bits I wouldn’t want to fall onto, the bolting was a tad excessive. Better too many than too few… The mozzies were out in force by the last climb. We easily sweated off repellent as soon as it was applied. A roadside general store (read: bamboo lean-to with a small fridge, grill and some consumables) supplied us with some icy-cold big Beer Changs. Nothing tastes as good as an icy cold beer after a day of climbing. The downer is the farang definition of icy cold involves both ice and coldness… We didn’t realize until after we were moving again that only two of the beers were cold. Warm Beer Chang is not a tasty beverage. It was drank anyway…

There was time to catch the end of the Wororot Day Market, aka the Chinese day market. An inside/outside mélange of stalls, stores and foodstuffs the fills four labyrinthine blocks just off the Mae Ping (Ping River). It was probably better to get there this late so that Jill and the girls didn’t get to five-sense the butcher section of the market. (Dozens and dozens of tables with a variety of meat and “meat” products. Refrigeration is not a commodity to be wasted on meats. Dairy, frozen foods, water and beer are kept cold.) What they did get to enjoy is the Thai delicacy of BUGS. A few sautéed larvae, roasted crickets and a beetle or two. Mmmmmm mmmmm good. No they do not taste like chicken. Actually they taste like crunchy rice puffs. An excellent source of protein as well. JD feels adding some chili and garlic and most people would think they were eating some kind of risotto or dried nuts… If he won’t tell you what the Chef’s Surprise is, consider yourself forewarned.

Friday was the Massengills last day up north. It was Elephant Trekking day! Mae Ta Man elephant camp is about 60k north of Chiang Mai proper. JD & KK went to this one two years ago. There are a number of trekking camps, many with poor track records concerning the care of the elephants. It is a mixed emotion type of thing. A certain amount of exploitation is occurring. At the same time these camps expose thousands of people to an endangered species, oftentimes prompting further action that actually helps the beasties. (Much more on this next post… JD was off at an elephant rescue for a week as a volunteer.)

Mae tam Mann is one of the better trekking places. Most mahouts seem to genuinely care for their charges, and it does back up to 20,000 acres of national forest that is open to elephant grazing. The program schedule is pretty complete: “Watch baths elephant follow by elephant skils. Raft bamboo down river. Lunch good Thai food. Ride elephant in jungle to ox cart. Ox cart through mountain village back to camp.”

Maetaman (Noticed it hasn’t spelled the same twice yet? It isn’t spelled the same anywhere. The sign, literature, tour guide brochures, hotel tour desks, and souvenirs all spell it differently in English. I have no doubt it always spells the same way in Thai script, I just can’t read it…) is a good sized facility covering quite a few acres. It has expanded since our last visit, yet is managing to hang onto its charm.

Elephants need up to 500 pounds of food a day. That’s a lot of bananas and sugar cane (and elephant grass, bamboo, saplings and anything else green that a pachyderm wants to put in its mouth). This is where many owners and mahouts go wrong. They become so intent on working the beasties to generate income that the elephants just don’t have time to eat what they need to. Here at Maet A Mann the elephants we have been on do seem to be allowed to stop and nibble along the walks, as well as the little snacks of ‘naners and cane.

That all being said, it was a “Best Day Ever” kind of day. Everyone had fun interacting with the elephants, we fed them lots and lots of snacks, had photo ops, a very fun ride on the raft (everyone got to have a shot at driving), a great meal, and a wonderful leisurely ride through the jungle. At one point JD’s camera ended up in the hands of a mahout. Everyone who gets a hold of JD’s camera becomes a shooting machine. It is fun to use. JD was only a tad bit nervous with the mahout running about with his camera which is the equivalent of a Thai family year’s total salary. He actually did a good job, and we tipped him when he returned the rig. Simultaneously, JD started breathing again too. The days tour ends with a stop at the orchid and butterfly farm on the outskirts of Mae Rim just north of Chiang Mai. The sky had opened up by then, making it wet, damn wet, to wander through the gardens.

The Massengills took full advantage of the last shopping night to secure gifts and goodies. We had a small sit-down seafood feast in the Kalare Night market. It was all good. In the morning we shipped them off to Bangkok and went on an apartment hunt. We are here for an additional six weeks and would rather not be in a hotel that whole time.

Blog interview with the Massengills:

What was your biggest pre-conceived expectation for Thailand?

Jonna: The biggest pre-conceived expectation of Thailand was the HEAT and humidity--while at a zoo in a rain forest exhibit it was very hot and humid and my dad said that was what it would be like in Thailand. Also thought it would be hard to breathe because of that.
Danielle: not very touristy dirt roads tropical
Scott: Having to keep a close eye on the girls (child trafficking) AND happy people AND that it would be hot.
Jill: To have a fantastic food experience, to see a lot of smiling faces, to do a bunch of rock climbing.

What was your first impression of the country?

Jill: Since we arrived after midnight the first things I noticed were the size of the bill boards and the unique letters, words and names on the street signs and stores.
Scott: The honesty of our taxi driver. He gave him some money for tolls and was given the exact change back. Noticing the right hand drive cars.
Danielle: humid, hot, crazy; the driving especially
Jonna: I thought it was busy and crowded and lots of different kinds of people.

What was the coolest thing south? (Phuket and Ao Nang)

Danielle: the beach
Jill: The Layzee bar....with the Thai classic rock band and the Thai boxer / singer that took his shirt off for us at Scott’s request. Damn he had a nice back.
I also enjoyed chatting with our hotel breakfast server named "Chard", but I liked to call him "The Chad". Happyman and the buckets of booze (Sam Song, lime soda and white shark...yum) and sitting in the spontaneous gutter bar. And of course, the fabulous beaches....especially the cheap and fun group beach massage with hand holding.
Jonna: The beaches and the shopping booths.

Scott: The Thai dude hanging from the guide wires (not tied in) on the parasail. The $5 beach massages with Mrs. Boonchoo, the pack of wild monkeys on the beach and the long boat ride ( Jill: I can't believe he LIKED that part, i only endured it) The wave runner ride with Danielle. Yee haw!

What was the un-coolest thing south?

Jonna: the SMELL and the expense
Danielle: too touristy/smelly
Scott: : The smell, "the whiffs of whatever that was". Kicking that damn fish.[Scott kicked a dead fish on thebeach that still had an active "stinger" and paid the penalty...] The aggressive touting in Phuket, especially the tailors trying to drag you into their shops
Jill: Patong beach was fun and beautiful but too tourist directed. Ao Nang was much more laid back and I liked it better, but I am still glad we went to Phuket/ Patong Beach.

Same two questions for the north (Chiang Mai)

Jill & Scott: The hour long elephant trail ride and the camp in general was the best and most unique part of the whole trip. The stupid walk around a circle at the circus just does not compare.
We both enjoyed "Monk Chat" very much. It was very cool to just sit and converse, ask questions, be curious, laugh and enjoy the wisdom and perspective of such a young monk.

Jill: The coolest part Chiang Mai was the accessibility of neat experiences and things to do/ see.... elephant camp, cooking school, Thai boxing, night market (even if we did spent too much time in it).
Danielle: The elephant and night bazaar
Jonna: The elephant day, the night market and the boxing experience

The uncoolest part of the North?

Scott: The uncoolest thing about Thailand as a whole was the heat and humidity.
Jill: I could ditto that, but the length of the plane ride was the worst part for me.
Scott: Too much time in shopping bazaars.
Jill: The uncoolest part of Chiang mai was that vacationing in a big city was not particularily relaxing. While cool in its own way, it was hectic and busy (like my life).
Danielle: no ocean really hot
Jonna: The ants and bugs

Did your expectation fall below or above the actual experience?

Danielle: Below [expectation] for smell above for how safe & friendly they were.
Jonna: It was above the expectations
Scott: : The stormy weather and large waves in the South limited our access to islands and more climbing.
Jill: (strange question...) It was better than we expected, but we still expected to have a string of the "best days ever" and we did.

Was your impression different after spending time here?

Scott: [He] appreciated how people related to each other and to us. The respect, honesty and kindness was everywhere. He appreciated the beautiful people... pretty women and men, slim figures, nice clothing and appearances.
Jill: Overall, I liked how the Buddhist philosophy (70% of Thai are Buddhist) teaches about Karma, kindness, mindfulness and much more cool stuff and how that transferred to a feeling of peace and safety for me, even in a dark alley in Bangkok. It is refreshing how a nation of people practicing peace really feels....
Jonna: Yes different
Danielle: no

Would you come back and why?

Jonna: Yes--I'd come back because I enjoyed it and it was so different from any other place I've been.
Jill: I would definitely come back, but not right away...i need to forget that long ass plane ride. (like having a baby, after awhile you forget the pain and only remember the good stuff). I am sooo happy for the family experience in Thailand. We all learned and saw so much, but I am most grateful for the powerful lessons my girls got in economics (how to dicker and how much things really cost compared to home) I also enjoyed the exposure to the "lady boy" scene and how the Thai culture accepts it, straight up. There was no weirdness or shame about it like at home.
Danielle: yes, to see more elephants
Scott: [overcome by emotion, Scott needed a moment. topic today: If bugs taste like puffed rice, what does puffed rice taste like? Talk amongst yourselves…]

Are there any specific events, actions or stories you found particularly entertaining while you were here?

Scott: Piling into the moped tuk-tuk with 6 of us and 1 driver. 7 people on 3 wheels, not to mention the backpacks.
Jill: The girly bar scene and the "does your friend have wife?" comment. The nipple tweaking massage for Scott and his comment right after "note to self- trim nipple hair". KK's trip goal is near enough satisfied.

I never realized how precious toilet paper could be and I find myself being more aware of how much I am using since I've been home. Since there are 3 girls in our house, Scott is always commenting about how much toilet paper we use. He is happy that I (maybe the girls too) are making an effort to use less.
Jonna: The beaches, elephant riding and the shopping
Danielle: Monk chat, night bazaar, massages on the beach




Thursday, August 23, 2007

1-9 July, Thailand 2, Part 1, South

1-9 July Thailand 2, Pt 1- South with the Massengills

Bangkok
We have Thai immigration and customs transit down pat. A brief stop by plant quarantine to clear our vanilla beans and we are off to Quality Suites. The Skytrain spur to the new airport has made amazing progress in a month. At least three kilometer of support platforms have been completed in just these few weeks. We are very excited to see the corner night market behind the hotel is already up and running. Food Stalls! We are a farang zephyr, sonic booms in our wake, dropping Baht and collecting yumminess. Little baggies of Tom Kha, little fritter thingies, a kilo and change of rambutan (a lychee-type stone fruit), some chicken-on-a-stick, some noodle stuff, and of course- extra peppers for everything! We carry our haul up to the room and let the feast begin.

Jazz is very big in Bangkok. HRM The King is an accomplished jazz saxophone player. He even has a few albums out. Therefore jazz is A Good Thing. There is a weekly Sunday night jam session at The Jolly Roger jazz club. It is near the Emporium shopping center and easily accessible from the skytrain. The last train back to Mon Chit station picks up in the Phrom Phong station around 11:30, so we get to enjoy a few mixed sets. A core group of three musicians bring on additional players, and rotate in and out as well. The music is good, and well worth the trip down.

Our friends the Massengills are set to arrive sometime after one AM. Scott, Jill and their daughters Danielle(14) and Jonna(13) are having their first International Family Trip (Canada never counts, it is just the socialist-light version of the US anyway…). They were delayed out of SeaTac, however Northwest held the connecting flight in Japan so odds where really good they were on the plane. JD waits up, with instructions to awaken KK at the arrival. JD ever the tour guide had sent explicit instructions on how to maneuver BKK and get a taxi to take you to where you actually want to go. One never knows if these things will work until the actual field trial… The taxi rolled up at 1:20 and a surprisingly awake family hopped out. KK made it down before the awakening and we all sat and caught up over a few home-made vanilla stoli’s and snacks. Our first really extensive conversations in American English in months!

We all will be hopping a flight to Phuket later in the morning. The time swing from the west coast is 14 hours ahead, so we had thought a few low-stress days on the beach to reset their internal clocks would be good. Ao Patong is about as touristy as you can get and still find some actual Thailand underneath, sometimes way underneath... Many may recall the Thai tsunami videos in ’04, almost all of that footage was from Patong. We had disembarked here from the repositioning cruise in ‘04, and it had been our first taste of Thailand. It is where we discovered the nirvana of Food Stalls! Happily Patong has more than fully recovered from the wave. Old businesses have been rebuilt, and many new buildings have been added. Patong has the deserved reputation as being a smaller Pattaya. (Pattaya being the home of 100’s of ex-pat retiree’s living for the joys of negotiable affection.) It is also a primary stop for Ozzie, German, and Italian tourists. Patong, Phi Phi, Bangkok, Samui and occasionally Chiang Mai are the typical stops fit into 10-day and 2-week packages.

Patong, Phuket

Our full baggage load is again upon us. Climbing gear is the lion’s share of the extra weight. The Massengills are hit by the shear physicality of the humidity. We still sweat (KK actually “mists”), we just stopped noticing it months ago. After a non-eventful flight we hire a van at Phuket International to bring us to the Andatel hotel. With a party of six, and all of our stuff cars just won’t work. Of course it stops at the tour company home office. JD uses the Secret Language, a clever mix of yes’s, no’s, smiles and nods, to get away without signing up for a single thing while still saving the tout, driver and ourselves face.

The Andatel Hotel is two blocks off the beach and just a block or so from food stall row. Nicely appointed rooms and a pool. An immediate run to the beach is in order.

There are huge waves banging the Andaman coastline of Phuket, and all of western Thailand. A cyclone had recently pounded northeast India and Bangladesh. The tailing waves from this event are still bouncing back and forth across 1,000’s of miles of the Andaman Sea, Bay of Bengal and Indian Ocean. This results in some pretty solid rollers and a huge low-tide rip. Many travelers, the Massengills included, do not care. They are here to get in the ocean, they are getting in the ocean. Period. (There is a portion of the chaos theory that explains the mechanism of weather: A butterfly flapping its wings in Tokyo can begin an air displacement effect that results in the formation of a hurricane in the Atlantic. One of JD’s favorite fiction authors, Terry Pratchett, has named this the Quantum Weather Butterfly in his novels. Before I blather on too much into theoretical physics, the real world has direct and measurable reactions globally from strong weather systems.) After a brief splash around we headed off to a big family Thai massage session.

The women folk are all upstairs; JD and Scott are side-by-side downstairs. Some Thai massage practitioners use tiger, monkey or dragon balm during the process, requiring shirts to be off. Our practitioners are having a bit too much fun… They made Scott and I hold hands for a bit, then his nipples fascinated them… They were so sad for JD when they found he had no “babies”. This has been the case throughout Asia when locals discover KK and JD are without offspring. (More on the paradigm behind that in a few posts) Everyone enjoyed his or her first Thai massages. US$6 still means something here!

Ahhh food stall land. A bit has changed in these past two years: there are fewer stalls, each one takes up more space, and a roof-like structure is being installed over the whole parking/eating area. (During the day this is the parking lot for a strip mall)

Chez Six-From-The-End, our previous favorite is no longer around. We give Three-North-Of-The-Middle a shot. Not cheap by Thai standards but tasty. Red Curry Prawns, noodles, veggies and a few Big Beer Changs. The 5 prawns weighed in just over a kilo… (2.2 lbs) Smaller stalls work the end of the strip and have more traditional food stall fare for other nights.

Nick’s HandleBar pub and motorcycle repair is still next-door to the Andatel. They were untouched by the wave. Years back JD had been introduced to “Nick”, who at the time was a large loquacious Ozzie. This time we all got to meet Nick, a smiling middle-aged Thai gentleman. JD assumed the new Nick had bought the place. He was incorrect. The bar had been taking the piss with him previously! The Bastards! The “new” Nick, apparently amused by JD’s confusion, bought us a round. All is right with the world again…

After finishing at Nick’s, JD, Scott and Jill enjoy a walk-about through the adult recreation portion of town. Working girls (and lady-boys…) are strategically dressed to entice passers-by into their drinking corner. Being low season it is as not as hardcore as it could be. (Patpong, the true destination for adult distraction in Bangkok, has the touts proffering “menus” of assorted skill sets of genital dexterity for the true connoisseur.)

It has been a few weeks since we had straight beach time. We have paled a bit… but we do have a bit of base tan left. The Massengills do not. A day of sun, beach snacks and big waves results in a large farang lobster fest. Red is the new white. Lots and lots of aloe vera to go around. It doesn’t stop anyone from a second day at the beach, though this time we set up camp in the shade.

Many expats have mentioned the Thai ability to replicate business models. Apparently innovation is not a cultural strong point. I would debate this to some degree, as I have seen incredible adaptations and some great “MacGuivered” contraptions.

OK- for those under thirty and maybe even those over 60: MacGuiver was an 80’s TV show with a lead character who oftentimes found himself in dire circumstances. In order to escape he would build a steam engine out of two ballpoint pens, a balloon and a PEZ dispenser, or a remote controlled robot out of an apple core, paper clip and a used typewriter ribbon (Again for the “too damn young” generation: a “typewriter” is an antique contrivance that was used to print papers. It evolved into the modern keyboard…). This seemingly incredible engineering ability was oftentimes assisted by his trusty Swiss Army Knife.

Anyway- this mindset is why you find ten stores in a row selling the exact same stuff. If Lek is selling red t-shirts to tourists, then it must be the thing to sell. Pom will then open a red t-shirt shop right next door. Pornsak will see both Lek and Pom being business people and feel he too must sell red t-shirts. This self-replication really has nothing to do with whether or not people are actually buying the red t-shirts. This is highly beneficial to the tourist however. You can almost always guarantee finding that red t-shirt (or whatever else you may want) for the price you want if you hit enough vendors.

This mimicry applies to entertainment as well. It seems that at some point in time a Thai producer traveled the US and hit the top entertainment locals: Vegas, Disney and Hollywood. He came home and had an epiphany that resulted in FantaSea Phuket.
A Disney-meets Tim-Burton-meets-Cirque D’Solei extravaganza based on the mythological history of Thailand. It has live elephants, acrobats, battles, puppets, ghosts, chickens, goats, comedy, magic and pyrotechnics. Jonna wasn’t feeling well (too much sun plus a time-change thing) so Scott stayed behind with her while KK, Jill, Danielle and JD went off to the show. It was over the top and highly entertaining. Worth a trip to Phuket. After the show you get to feed ‘naners and cane to the baby elephants. Good stuff.

Ao Nang, Krabi

We choose the overland route to Ao Nang, our next stop. Some climbing at Railay, and a more laid back atmosphere is in order. Phranyang Place is still available, and the ladies are happy to see us again.

Walk east along the beach to the imposing brick gate and then pass through into massage heaven. Twenty Bamboo pole-barn type structures, each a private massage business. Mrs. Boonchoo uses a tried and true marketing technique: Free Stuff. Her personal approach is free fruit. Pineapple and banana. Since all six of us wanted simultaneous massage, she brought in friends from nearby salals. Massage Party! She was a daily routine during our stay in Ao Nang.

Afterwards she would give us extra fruit for the troop of ling noi (little monkeys or literally Monkey Little) up the beach. Aggressive little buggers, they saw the fruit coming and were more than happy to meet it half way…

The weather is not overly cooperative, making the longtail trip to Railay less than pleasant. We actually limit the trip to just once. A climb each and we had to catch a longtail back before the sea became too rough. As it was the whole boatload, both people and stuff, was deluged in the breakers. It was a harrowing experience, and a bit on the edge. The boat actually stopped about halfway so the driver could pour water on the engine. The “cool” water intake was regularly being pulled from the sea, so the engine wasn’t able to draw enough to maintain temperature. Our driver was incredibly skilled. I would not want to be maneuvering a heavy keel through this water, much less a shallow draft longtail. The protected anchorage for the longtails is on the far side of Ao Nang from our place, so transport is needed. We pull a clown-car routine and pile six giant farangs (OK, four giant farangs and two regular size farangs) and our climbing gear into a tuk-tuk built for three. The tires really wanted to explode, or least jump their rims, yet did not. The driver managed to keep us upright while maneuvering speed bumps and traffic. It was even more adventurous than the longtail ride, and that is saying something…

However, all was not lost. Khun Hok, Happy Smiling Man with the beverage stall, was set up as usual. He would plop five little plastic stools in the gutter and serve up cocktails. Hok’s Gutter Bar is what we call it. Even with the scrappy sea, it was good to hang on the beach. Food was plentiful and delish. During a late evening stroll, Jill and JD were a bit ahead of Scott. As they pass a more active outdoor bar one of the lady touts asks if their friend (Scott) is married. Jill replied in the affirmative and indicated quite directly it was to her…

We had checked out a flyer for the Lazy Bar. Live rock ‘n roll and Fire Dance nightly. It’s a 4 kilometer tuk-tuk ride out of town. The girls were comfortable with DVD’s in the hotel so the adults all piled in tuk-tuk for a ride. Five Thai guys decided to open a bar that was NOT a tourist girly bar. One was a host, one was a bartender, and three were the rock’n roll band. They were a blast. A regular was on vocals for a Thai cut. He was a “real” Muay Thai boxer. The women wanted some skin, so Scott walked up the stage and through gesture and mime got the idea across that there were ladies with needs. The boxer proudly complied to the delighted screams and wolf calls of the entire place. Yes, he was ripped, and I would really not want to be on the receiving end of his wrath. The host was also the Fire Dancer. He had enjoyed more than a few SangSom’s during the course of the evening yet still had a wildly energetic and complex routine that seemed to combine Muay Thai, Kung Fu and classic fire dancing. Catching airborne flaming balls on a chain, behind your back, in the dark, while enjoying a good buzz, with your TOES certainly impressed the hell out of us.

With the rainy season in full swing in the south, we decide to head north to Chiang Mai. We try a new carrier, NokAir. The “Nok Plus” is their business class, which has a higher baggage weight allowance, bigger seats and a free newspaper! It is also less than half the price of the coach seat on Thai Air. We do have a few hour layover in Bangkok (Don Muang-old airport).

KK and Jill stay with the luggage at an airport cafe. JD, Scott and the Girls head to IT Square, the electronics mall a few kilometers from the airport. JD needs a new CF card for his camera (note for parents: CF is a type of memory card for digital cameras. It is what is used instead of film). After this many months of abuse: vibration, humidity, temperature swings and erasure, his current microdrive CF is randomly losing photos. This does not make him a happy camper. Doesn’t matter how many hundreds of photos you take, inevitably the time you only take one of a unique event is the one that will get lost in electron limbo. Memory is cheap, especially in Asia. He picks up a 2G fixed CF for about US$20.

The flight to Chiang Mai is short and sweet.